Thinking About Great Men and Other Subjects

I've lately been mentally listing everything that's wrong with me. (1 put the word "wrong" in italics because I would say it in italics. It's the same reason this comment is in parenthesis.) After listing some few items I generally take one large mental step backwards and view the list.

There is usually something wrong with the list.

Depending on how I feel at the time, the list is too long, or too short, or too general, or too specific, or. ..

One item is always there, however, "I don't do anything productive" is always on the list.

Everybody I know worries about this, I think because they feel that if they didn't do some patently un-productive worrying about their productiveness it would go away (their productiveness, that is.) They're all sure it's a valid worry, and they're all wrong. Everybody I know is very productive, one way or another. Except me, of course.

All I do is think. I think foolishly, or brilliantly. I think about things which are obvious and trivial, or deep and trivial. I think in a very cynical fashion much of the time. (Some people I know would think that my thinking that I think cynically is a somewhat understated thought, but probably most of them would think, "Oh God, more bullcookies" or even "Jeez, if I pay the bills I won't be able to eat" Where was I?)

Any student of history will tell you that simply thinking is not at all productive. You must act. Hannibal didn't think about crossing the Alps, he went ahead and crossed 'em. Anybody who'd actually thought about taking a little jaunt over the roughest terrain this side of Tibet, on elephantback, would've chickened-out instantly.

No, the act is the thing. History is filled with Great Men who didn't think at all. Look at Hercules. Well, okay, the stables was a bit of a poser, but the river was handy. I mean, it was right there in plain sight. He probably got lucky with the Hydra. Alright, so maybe Hercules isn't such a good example. Nevertheless, it's pretty safe to say that Hercules was long on muscle and short on cranial-justifier, or he wouldn't've gotten suckered into doing all of that (productive) work. And now he's a constellation, making other people think about how insignificant one planet really is, or how bad the smog is tonight.

Hercules was one of a class of Great Men known as "Heroes." Heroes are usually guys who've conquered something. Normally they conquer other guys, who, since they are conquerees instead of Conquerees, are not Heroes. Heroes usually get to be Heroes because they are extremely good at beating people up. They are picked as Heroes by another class of men who may become Great Men, "Politicians."

Historically, the largest class of Great Men is Politicians. Politicians are a very successful life-form. They have been with us ever since Og thoughtlessly threw a rock over his shoulder and killed Ug. Since Ug's widow was demonstrating her grief with a large club, Og blamed the killing on a neighboring tribe. Humanity gained war and politics almost simultaneously. Note that Og was not a Hero because he didn't take the credit for killing Ug; he was not a Great Man because almost no one has ever heard of him; he wasn't even a very good Politician because he actually thought of blaming the other tribe.

Politicians don't think. They act on what their advisors (hired thinkers) tell them to act on, and they become Great Men. You might say, "Aha! But there's thinking going on via the advisor-politician chain, so some Great Men do, after a fashion, think" but you'd be wrong. The advisors are all apprentice Great Men.

Now, don't get me wrong. Lack of thought, or even lack of thinking ability doesn't automatically produce a Great Man. If that were the only prerequisite most people would qualify. Being a Great Man involves many things, like Lack of Concern for Anything But Greatness, Willingness to Expend Anything to Get the Thing Done, and Believing whatever it is you're saying at the Moment Some of these concepts are kind of difficult to explain but I'll attempt it anyway.

Lack of Concern For Anything But Greatness is actually fairly simple to grasp. If you've ever had something to do (remodelling a kitchen, say) you know how a thing can get on your mind and worry at you until you can't pay attention to anything else. It's guilt that does this. LCABG (it's th~ age of the acronym, remember?) is like feeling guilty about not getting the kitchen done, except you feel guilty about not being the richest, most powerful, most well-known person on Earth. LCABG is a little easier to deal with than the kitchen, however; anybody who's ever remodelled a kitchen knows that it takes awhile.

Willingness to Expend Anything to Get the Thing Done (WEAGTD) is related to LCABG. Great Men simply can't allow things like compassion or ethics to stand in the way of Greatness. They must be willing to sacrifice these sorts of luxeries. Sacrifice is the key word, here; if you doubt it think of all the sacrificial lambs in Washington. Great Men must be able to sacrifice anything-you, me, their Grandmother, their dog-to achieve or maintain Greatness. Would our world leaders be potentially Great Men if they weren't capable of destroying the planet on a moment's notice?

Believing whatever it is you're saying at the Moment (BM) is the hardest concept to explain. It is very difficult to understand how anybody could believe some of the things Great Men say, let-alone themselves. (Note: BM is similar to Barking with Sincerity, but not exactly the same. BS will allow the average person to get by. Being Great requires true BM.) The word that comes closest to describing what Believing whatever it is you're saying at the Moment really is, is "gall". I'm afraid that if you want further information I must refer you to 1984 by George Orwell (read the section on DoubleThink), The Prince by Machievelli, and anything written by Mark Twain.

So, LTA (Lack of Thinking Ability) alone will not insure Greatness. Still, not thinking is a step in the right direction.

We in America (Canada and Mexico don't count) have an opportunity no other population our size has ever had. We could all be Great Men. The tools for learning how are all there. We have mindless entertainment, meaningless social interaction, the "Military Industrial Complex", and examples of political expediency that put to shame the greatest non-thinkers history has yet produced. We have his-&-hers under-arm deoderant. It is obvious that there is no excuse for lack of greatness in this country.

But, I ramble. As I said, I make lists of what's wrong with me. I should probably choose one of them and write it down. That way, I could wake up one morning and simply look at the list and act on it.

I'll think about it.

...Kevin Kinnell...

The Way to Run a Culture

(The following delightful anecdote is excepted from the writings of Gregory Bateson, and was contributed by Ed Hessler. )

"New College, Oxford, is of rather late foundation, hence the name. It was, probably founded around the late 16th century. It has, like other colleges, a great dining hall with big oak beams across the top, yes? These might be eighteen inches square, twenty feet long.

"Some five to ten years ago, so I am told, some busy entomologist went up into the roof of the dining hall with a penknife and poked at the beams and found that they were full of beetles. This was reported to the College Council, who met in some dismay, because where would they get beams of that caliber nowadays?

"One of the Junior Fellows stuck his neck out and suggested that there might be on College lands some oak. These colleges are endowed with land scattered across the country. So they called in the College Forester, who of course had not been near the college itself for some years, and asked him about oaks.

"And he pulled his forelock and said, Well, sirs, we was wonderin' when you'd be askin'.'

"Upon further inquiry it was discovered that when the College was founded, a grove of oaks had been planted to replace the beams in the dining hall when they became beetly, because oak beams always become beetly in the end. This plan had been passed down from one Forester to the next for four hundred years. 'You don't cut them oaks. Them's for the College Hall.'

" A nice story. That's the way to run a culture. " ~

...Edward Hessler...

November 15 Meeting of the Board

November 15 Meeting of the Board As we announced in the September Letters, the Board of Directors will meet in Washington DC on Saturday, November 15. The meeting will begin at 9:30AM, but alas, the best we can do now is say Cat a central, downtown location.' November's Letters will be out early enough to notify everyone of the exact location in ample time. All members and friends are welcome to attend.

© Copyright 1986
Institute for domestic Tranquility